♥ BW0KENSMILE-X@BS.COM

Thursday, May 28, 2009 Y 5:40 AM

so long nev tag le..ya..ok lets start off with a roach incident that happened both today and monday morning.so..it was a usual morning,i was in the car,half-dozing,then suddenly,i felt something crawling on my arm,i thought it was a strand of hair,so i flicked it off.that 'hair'landed on the edge of the car interior door handle,(u know the one where you can stuff tissues in?)then it started moving.im not that afraid of bugs,but still,i was quite annoyed,cant i nap in peace without an annoyin bug buggin me?!GRR..so i tried ignorin it.but to no avail,it seemed to crave attention by crawlin towards me.okk...so,i did the ultimate thing,i aim and grabbed the roach's damned feelers(im not sure if it is the feeler or the wing or the leg or what other body part..it was dark,so i cant see clearly..),opened the window,and flicked it out with expert skill that i never knew existed in me..i was like..WOAH..i touched a bug.

hope that the Roach landed on something soft,i dont wanna kill it...(T.T)

that reminds me..i did a horrible horrible thing today!I KILLED SOMEONE!!!i took an innocent life!!I KILLED...a Snail..

i really didnt mean it though..i was happily chattin like nobody's business,then it happend.it was so quick that i took a few seconds to digest what had happened..

All i heard was a loud CRACK,and lots of screamin...i guess it took about 2 seconds for it to dawn upon me that i actually killed a snail..the poor fellow's shell was shattered(and i dont wanna descibe its body..which was mangled beyond its identity..uhh..)and now..it feel so gulity..i was named the snail murderer today by quite a number of people...i SWEAR,i didnt mean it!!!To all snail lovers out there,im sorry that i killed a snail,it was really just an accident...uhh....(-.-'')

i guess thats all...

Monday, May 25, 2009 Y 3:10 AM

Todays sucha boring day.
i woke up feeling all so crappy...yaws...did the usual stuff(brushing teeth n taking more than 15 mins doing my messy hair)and headedoff to school.
i got back some of my papers!
i did well for mothertongue!(much to my pleasant surprise!i thought i might fail you know?!)
passed my emaths..(i was relieved to have passed,but still feels disappointed that im below average...)
failed chemistry and amaths and history(i expected much much more for chem and history.)it was the last thing in my mind that i would fail my history!!Never in history did i ever fail my History paper!ahh!!I was pinning all my hopes on history !!!failed chem and amaths both by 4 marks!!!can imagine how disappointed i am!(somemore for amaths it was ALL due to carelessness!!!Grr..)
i sat in my seat and moped,feeling dreadfully left out and miserable...the world seemed to have come crashing down on my head.still tried to smile though... (im glad it seemed to work pretty well!)
after school,went with wanxuan to collect the cheque and passport,then i went to the CO room with her,watched her demo playing the double bass and cello,all the while i was worryin that the string might break..(but it didnt!thank goodness!i might have freaked out)she's sucha pro!!i tried playing it but all it came out was some freaking dying cat sounds..uhh..-.-''
she played canon which i thought was really awesome!at around 3.05pm,my dad called and said that my sis went to te hospital.i was freakin scared but thankfully nothing serious happened,after a short check-up,she was allowed to go home.i went home and moped around the house,constantly lingering near the piano.told my mum some of my better results,i really do not know of what else to say...should i tell her ofmy other failed results?or should i just keep quiet?im so lost!

Tuesday, May 19, 2009 Y 4:58 AM

todays sucha sucky day!!!
i hated getting scolded for nothing!Esp' when its NOT MY FAULT!!!! what the hell is happening recently?i DUNNO!!!
my parents have always been siding my little sis for like..3 years?i've tolerated for 3 years,and suddenly,that inner me inside me must have snapped i guess...urh..i lost control....i admit i did a couple of horrible stuff,i could still recall a time when i bit her..(lol..imagine that..) but still,despite all these,that bias-ness still went a little overboard i think..my sis would storm into my room,at any random hour,any random second,with a sadistic smile on her face,snatch away my pencil box,and start dropping my stationary into the dustbin,one by one,then sneer at me..obviously you will feel angry,but the worst thing is,you cant do anything,for if you did,you will get ten times worst of punishment...yeah,that was what hapened today when i snapped..
my sis,stormed into my room,(as usual,)i was doing my piano theory homework,due tomorrow,and started hitting me for no particular reason.she has weird mood swings....i felt..abused,obviously ,and told her to stop,which she didn't...when i got up and approached the door,she wreastled me and pinned me down again..she screamed at my mum that i was shrieking vulgarities at her,(which i honestly didnt..)
mum was furious and believed every single thing sis said,i got scolded,beatened and further humiliated when my mum starting telling everyone how selfish and cruel i am to my siblings.i kept silent throughout the ordeal but these words kept clouding my mind
"why?Why?WHY?"
i wanted so hard and so badly to cry out loud,but i couldnt..for i will be further humiliated.i know my sis is suffering from a certain disorder illness,causing her to have seizures and mood swings,so i wouldnt blame her for that,but it still hurts to be constantly treated this way.i hate it when my sis behaves this way,this sis is so different from the sis i knew 3 years ago!AND I HATE IT!!!!This illness has ruined my sis' life,changed my parents and also affected me for crying out loud!!!
it sucks and sucks when you have to force a smile whem i m at school.But unless i wanna be a social reject,i guess thats the only way.i really hope that she will be better in the near future,and change for the better.
WOOTS!!!!
it feels good now once i 've let everything off my chest...wakakakaka...
i guess thats all folks!(dont worry,the rest of the posts wont be as emo as these...)haha
(>.<)Polar

Friday, May 15, 2009 Y 5:43 AM

ok..since i was asked to blog again..i will quietly do as i was told..(see im sucha nice little O girl!)

erm...yea..today,we got an outing with Tiikah,Rita and Nabilah..we went to watch this movie 17 again!!!it was very nice!(as expected)and i really enjoyed it..and this rita ah..haish...kept bugging me saying ZAC is HOT and all...until i think im gonna have nightmares of him..Oo...

i was laughing so much at that part when the principle and the Nick(is it Nick?sry i cant recall his name...)kept talking elfish!!haha..it was sooo funny..and that part when Zac ate a really horrid sandwich with cheese and celery and more cheese,i thought i might puke on the spot..uhh...

so,after the movie we went LJS!!!(the usual..)yea..and i ate the usual..and as usual,im the slowest...(i'll admit that...)after that..erm..ya..we wandered around..went to Harris,to Popular..then then wandered somemore..then went home!

Nabilah took the same bus as me and we were talking,(very very enthu)about our..our...RESULTS..and how we

d screw up on our exams..haha..all in all,i had a fun day!!!except that once i got back to the shop..i did very retarded stuff to pass time...(see the stupid couple-finger pics above and you will get what i mean..)ahem..

Thursday, May 14, 2009 Y 6:19 AM

HIIII!!!YR BELOVED PACY IS BACK!!!

Miss me?i know you did!(>.<)

okok....ihave alot of catching up to do..but.nevm...

TODAY MY LAST PAPER JUST ENDED!!!AHHH!!ITS THE END OF EXAMS!!!YESHH!!!

im soo freakin happy!but i kept my feelings bottled up!haha....(quite good at hiding emotions!)

So today after sch,after exchanging our comments about the horrid Phypaper,me and Rita went to 3c,where we chatted with Chinyee and Yiru...after that,we strolled to the canteen,accompanied the Chicken and JN..chatted awhile then JN went up to 3c...aww...after we finished our milo,we went to bubbleshop!YAY!ate the usual..CHEESEFRIES>>>

ya.thenthen,went to 3c and chatted somemore...took pics and gossiped..then at 12:30,Rita-ed went for GM,then me and Yiru went Imm,where i bought a cup!;]

wandered aimlessly in IMM for awhile b4 heading to the library..it was soo damned the hell crowded!!(but we still managed to find a spot!TEEHEE!!!)

Sat there and emo-ed for awhile...then i started hunting for comics..found a whole stack and slowly started reading..i finished 7 books!hahaha...ya..then when we going home ,Rita-ed called and talked nonsense..i could hardly hear her!!!(Rita,if you are seeing this now,plsss talk louder and dont murmur!!!)haha...

reached the shop in less than 15min..continued reading the comics that i borrowed..emo-ed more until Matt called me!!haha...talked about exams..and the old times!!!Love you mans!you're the bestest !!!Make me laugh my guts out!haha..

Cant make up my mind whether to go watch movie or Kbox..i seriously prefer Kbox.but nevermind!(>.<)

hahahaha....EXAM IS OVER!!gonna go play sims again!

i gues thats al!